Avoiding Peer Pressure
Peer pressure is a fact of life. We all want to be thought of as cool and to have the ability to fit in with our friends - or those we want to be our friends. The truth is, real friends probably won't ask you or expect you to do something you aren't comfortable with. For instance, if you have friends that decide it's cool to smoke, take drugs or be mean to someone else, don't feel like you have to join in. Being firm and saying "I don't feel like it" is a lot stronger than caving in to bad decisions. If you find yourself in a situation where there is peer pressure, here are some things you can do to avoid giving in and looking "chicken."
- Make a joke out of it. Getting someone to laugh often takes the pressure out of a situation.
- Say you've made a promise to yourself because someone you know smokes or does drugs (or some other thing) and you don't want to be like that.
- Say you don't have to explain yourself - you simply don't want to do it. Remember - you don't have to do anything you don't want to or that makes you uncomfortable.
- Deflect the situation by asking a question like, "Hey - what are we doing after this?" Sometimes distraction works well.
- Walk away or do something else.
- Change the subject.
- If you think you'll be in a situation you can't handle, arrange to have someone you know text you or call you so you can leave.
- Say "maybe next time" and then try to make sure there is never a next time. Anticipate situations where the peer pressure may be on again so you'll be prepared to say no.
- Your friends may call you names or tease you after you refuse to participate, but they'll quickly forget about that and move on. Often times if you say no, it encourages someone else to say no, and the pressure suddenly shifts to NOT do something.
Things to keep in mind:
- Just because it's the cool crowd doesn't mean it's much fun. It's a different set of pressure you may or may not want to be part of.
- Sometimes the cool kids like to change friends (because they think it's cool). You could end up being on the outside of the group even if you participate in their peer pressure games.
- You can practice what you preach by respecting the choices of others.
- Think about the consequences - on yourself, on your family, on your school and on your future. Know in your heart what the right thing to do is.
- Always feel okay to talk to someone about peer pressure in your life like an outside friend, family member, teacher or counselor. Many adults have been through what you're going through and can offer helpful advice and supportive listening.
